Monday, February 28, 2022

S'up, Muh DAB? - Is this Bye Bye? Part 3

 PREVIOUSLY on S'up, Muh DAB? - Is this Bye Bye?:
I told you about enjoying the single life with my Die Alone Buddy, Brett.

Then, Brett married Andrew

...and I made their marriage about me.

There, now that you're all caught up,
let me tell you how their marriage has affected me.
Not, badly, at all.

While there's really not more to say on the subject, 
I have some pictures I'd like to share,
so, I'm gonna go on a bit.

First, I'll say that one of the biggest fears
I had about losing muh DAB
was that once he was married,
he'd end up being tied to the waist of his new husband
leaving me no time for buddy time with Brett.

I'm happy to say, 
that that has not been the case.
Brett and Andrew have been able to maintain their relationship,
while not spending every freakin' moment of the day & night together.
They each have time when they can enjoy stuff with their friends,
or have time alone.
That has been my ideal all along,
and know that if I ever do find that someone,
this would be a big part of our relationship.
As I said in the few on-line dating profiles I've had,
"I'm looking for 
someone who respects my my independence as much as they value their own."

I'm very happy for muh former DAB
for finding this.

That's not to say that there hasn't been any affect on our friendship.
Now, there's negotiations that need to be made before we can have our fun.
In the past, when we've decided we're going to Miami for the 4th of July,
(WHY? It's so gosh-darned hot!! 
...but we have!)
we could just make our travel arrangements and go.
Now, if we ever wanted to do that,
Brett has to consult with someone before I can start picking hotels.

Also new; there's a whole other group of friends
to consider for invites to events.
What if Brett & Andrew are having an event that has to be small?
Now, not only am I contending with my own stable of friends,
suddenly, I'm up against Andrew's group of friends
for an invite, too!

for all my worries about being left out
or loss of time with Brett, 
the past couple of years have been pretty good.

Spending time with these two as a couple
has been quite nice.
Andrew fits in really well,
which can't be easy for someone younger
blending into a friendship
that's over 20 years old.

As I said, I don't see Andrew every time that I see Brett,
but I have seen him at times that are special to me.

...Like, my Birthday, including me in a surprise for Brett's birthday

...or showing up when I'm in a dress

Speaking of which,
while I haven't spent much time with Andrew alone, 
we did share something special
without Brett.
Andrew donated a good portion of his time to help me 
with my return to the BEST IN DRAG SHOW,
to do a farewell number before I  handed over the crown.
I loved Chita Rivera's performance of 
on the Tony awards and chose that for my show.
Andrew bravely agreed to dumb down the choreography for me,
a major non-dancer
and for two other hunky guys
who didn't exactly go to the FAME school of performing arts,
Ruben Zambrano and Erick Nett.
(Both sweethearts)

I'm sure he knew it would be a major undertaking,
but he did it,
for no pay, like, literally for charity

He graciously agreed to be in the number

...and literally do the HEAVY LIFTING.

I can not say how much I appreciated that 
and couldn't be more proud of the work 
he put into making it happen.

In addition to 
being a great guy and helping out new friends,
he also appears to have a high tolerance
for our ridiculous idea of fun,
which includes, but is not limited to
Brett's photoshoots.
Sometimes, these can take an entire day,
but we enjoy the set-up time and the bonding.
Plus, they're really neato!!

I don't know if he thinks they're as fun as we do,
but he shows up!

Speaking of we:
I'm not the only one Andrew has to deal with,
there's a small, tight group of us
that he's squeezing into 
and that can't be easy.

The dinners,

the holidays;
 a Christmas

a Fourth of July

a wedding...

So, while it may have been somewhat intimidating for him, 
I'm very appreciative that Andrew
did not come in like a wrecking ball
and lay waste to Brett's friendships and friends-time,
as I've seen happen in other cases.
I needn't have feared losing anything it all.

And, even though
I have realized, over time,
that I can be stand-offish and not let people in right away,
I look forward to further developing a
lovely friendship with Andrew!
...If he has the patience.

So, while Brett may no longer be dying alone with me,
at least, 
and most importantly,
we still get to watch
crappy horror movies together
from time to time!

Happy union Brett & Andrew
and thanks for the time!

Friday, February 18, 2022

Too Busy For Love - Lonely Hearts Club Be Damned!

Were you alone this Valentine's Day?
Were you sad about it?
I was alone, but totally not sad.
Listen, just because I am perfectly content not being partnered,
I do sometimes feel the pangs of loneliness.

One way I've come to beat the lonesome blues is to keep busy,
or keep interests that don't require other people 
to be enjoyed.
One of my interest is colorful things.
I enjoy colorful things. ...many different colorful things.
For example, I have a large Dunny collection.
(That means a bunch of colorful vinyl crap takes up space in my home)

I also enjoy art.
I enjoy many types and styles of art.
My favorite would have to be Pop Surrealism,
with artist like Mark Ryden, Mark Bryan and Buffmonster.
I also enjoy shirtless men,
So, I enjoy the art of the shirtless mans.
One particular artist I like to support is
I like his style and we have the same taste in men.
Here are a couple of his
Valentine's Day offerings. 

So, as you can see, one way I keep my heart full
and too busy for love
is following, admiring, collecting and displaying art.
While it would be nice to have someone to share this folly with,
I certainly don't need anyone to validate my fun.

If you do find yourself lonely
more often than you can stand,
there are other ways to combat that.
I'm no doctor
(even though I am quite wise in the art of alone...)
 So, I'll hand this topic off to the folks at 
Who'll provide 18 ways to overcome loneliness.
(Click the Psychology Today text above)

Monday, February 14, 2022

Happy Valentine's Day 2022!!

If you're alone on this special day,

Today is the day to enjoy yourself
the way you want to!
...or even ignore the day, as you please!

Today I celebrate
the peace and happiness I find within myself,
the comfort I feel in solitude
and unchallenged dominance of the TV remote control.

I enjoy being free of fretting
that I didn't pick the right gift,
 chose the wrong card,
didn't make the day special enough,
spoke the wrong words,
scared someone into thinking I love them more than they love me, 
or they love me more than I love them,
worrying that it's just over...

Today I celebrate the love I have
from my family and friends,
the happiness that fills my heart when I dog sit,
the taste sensation when I eat what I want,
and the pleasure at the touch only I know how to give...

If you are partnered with someone you love, 
congratulations to you, as well! 
Cherish that!

If you are not partnered.
enjoy yourself and have a 


Saturday, February 5, 2022

Gay of A Certain Age - Craft Night 2022

After skipping a year, Craft Night 2022 has come and gone.

Craft Night may be the only night of the year when I have ANYONE in my home.  Deadly contagion made sure that I couldn't have one in 2021. I was torn by the idea of missing another year, but with the pandemmy still going on, I couldn't just fill up my home with a bunch of people and hope the Covid Fairy wouldn't pop in and sprinkle Omicron dust on everyone. So, I decided to have a very scaled down version with a vaxed 10 person max.  It was difficult to cut back the invite list, but I started with the O.G.s who've been coming since 2006, followed by those with seniority... it filled up fast.  

I don't think there was a moment when I actually had ten people in my home at one time, and while I missed the excitement & fun of the usual big crowd, I did appreciate the chance to sit and gab & craft with folk.

Of course, we had a photo set up...

We had a fun time posing for pics, 
but let's get to the REAL stuff we're here for,
This year, I had more nice cards than usual...

Then, there were the kinda naughty cards

...And, infamously, the Naughty Cards, that you can see HERE

It was a fun night, to be sure!
And, as a Gay of A Certain Age, I know to cherish such evenings with friends. (Especially, after last year!)

While I hold each and every one that came close to my heart, 
I'm excited to get back to a full guest list, hopefully next year!

Have Exactly the kind of Valentine's Day you want!!