Wednesday, April 25, 2018
Being an actor is often one of the reasons I am TOO BUSY FOR LOVE and I think I can honestly say, it has never been the reason I have gotten a date. Maybe if I up the stakes a little? I have a co-star role on CHAMPIONS this week and I'm hoping some nice, decent looking fellow who values my independence as much as he values his, will see this and scoop me up. If not, I had a great time and really enjoy the show. I think you will, too. WATCH IT! And if you've never seen it catch up On Demand!
Also, I'm not in drag in this!!
MY EPISODE DID NOT AIR ON THE 26TH!
Thursday, April 19, 2018
Hey! Here's another picture game right out of the pages of GUYLIGHTS!
Let's play OPTICS! Above is a photo captured by a friend at another table, whilst I was dining at Cafe D'Etoile on Friday night. Examine the photo very closely (tilt the pic if you have to) and determine what you see...
Do you see:
1: A gay, happily delighted that he happens to be eating dinner very closely to (almost seemingly with) super talented actress lady, Sharon Gless (Star of QUEER AS CAGNEY & LACEY)?
or, do you see:
2: A tragically single gay, eating alone on a Friday night, in a fancy restaurant, shamelessly playing an old version of Angry Birds at the table, sucking it in as he twists in his chair hoping the friend taking the picture will not post it anywhere?
Which did you see?
Compare with your friends!
Remember; any way you look at it, it's all about OPTICS!
Saturday, April 14, 2018
Alright, I'm not having much luck on FU Cupid, so when I saw a Top 10 New Dating Apps article, I just went ahead with their top choice, ZOOSK. I hate it.
First of all, I posted a few pics that I think look like me...
This is my profile picture
I think it's pretty good; I'm looking directly in the camera, it's in focus, the background is only threatening to be more interesting than me, my smile indicates I'm happy to be here, fun & open and you can tell how fat I am by my face. Nothing deceptive going on here besides a little color boost.
I set a up a profile, that could be better, but at least is very specific about what I like & who I am.
So, I set off on my new adventure, hopping on to the Carousel ride known as "Carousel" (If you're hep with movie references, 'Carousel' , in LOGAN'S RUN, was where people are spun around and shot to death when they reach 30 years of age, so to me, this is not a good thing). Here, Carousel is where you click and either like or don't like guys based on only their photo using a big "X" or checkmark. Immediately, I'm struck by the fact that there a lot of unfortunate looking fellas in my area. I don't mean to sound snobby or Looksist, but so many of these guys look like they've given up! I'm looking at a range between 35-60 and most of them have a look on their faces that looks like the wish they had opted for the Logan's Run Carousel years ago! To be honest some of them might be more appealing if they had chosen photos that don't feature them in; 1. Sunglasses and hats (hiding them like some kind of kooky heroine in a 70's heist spoof) 2. Pain (Seriously, some of the expressions on these guys make them look like they're passing a kidney stone!) 3. The middle of a convulsion (Shaky camera work, blurry photo... do they not know how to work a camera, decide what is a good photo or trying to hide something) 4. Swimwear that they should not be in (Usually, more coverage is preferred). 5. A line up at the police station (Some of these guys look like they just stepped out of prison, and not realeased for good behavior).
Look, I know picking a profile pic isn't the easiest thing in the world, but one should be concerned whether it is a basically good shot as well as one that conveys some truth about one's self.
Some of the basic mistakes I see are;
I mean, c'mon! I think you might be cute... the best I could tell from this shot is one's weight/body proportion (vaguely) and your next door neighbor is very kind for taking a picture for you from their living room window.
At least I know this guy has a head. ... and central air (Bonus!)
Parts is Parts
The body parts shot is never more disturbing than when it is just a part of a face. What's going on below the frame, you got the Alien retractable 2nd set of jaws down there?
Again, I hardly think I'm any sort of Adonis, but these issues in photos bother me not because I'm a photo snob (Which I am), but because they all occur for the one primary reason... they are hiding something. I don't know if they're just shy, insecure or tricksters at heart, but I'm not attracted to any of those things, so I move on. SERIOUSLY though, how difficult is it to get a well lit, in focus picture with your face in the middle of it???
Then there are the ones whom I do find attractive, but are incompatible because their profile says things like "smoker", "fit for fit only" and the hugest turn off ever, "Straight acting here, looking for the same". I can't believe people still write that shit and still don't know what it says about them.
Well, I did manage to find someone whose profile I found as attractive as their pic, so I sent him a message saying "Hi". That's when the little window popped up "Upgrade if you want to know if he's read your message!" Wait, I paid 59.99 for 3 months and that's not included? I clicked on the button and found all these other NOT CHEAP upgrades that should be included for 59.99 (Which automatically renews!) There is "Guarantee that anyone can respond to you" for 9.99 a month (Wait, I can send 15 messages to someone, but never know that they can't reply to me?- after paying 9.99 a month to know that they read message?) There's "Control your visibility" for 8.99 a month (is it worth that much to control whether a guy I'm not stalking can see if I looked at his profile?) There's "Boost your visibility" for 9.99 (Which implies that they are holding back my profile in some way- and that $59.99 is not enough) "Instant Crush" for 9.99 lets that person know that you like them when they randomly click on your profile, if ever. (So I click the star thingy to say I like someone, but they don't know until I pay extra?? WTF? Who the hell am I telling I like this person when I click the star, if not THAT guy???) Of course, all of these boosts and bonuses renew automatically seperately, so you have to be on your toes or you could end up spending $100 on useless profiles & add ons. I'm only slightly surprised I haven't seen "Cat In The Hat" which lets you know if the man you're talking to and really interested in is actually real or some being made up by the Assholes at Zoosk. "Anti-Vanity" for only 8.99 a month you can be sure that your profile is visible to more than just you! At this rate, the stupid app should be called Zoo$k.
After this fresh hell, I've realized that OK Cupid isn't as bad as I thought, but still- this on-line dating stuff is crap- F U Cupid!!
Tuesday, April 10, 2018
Remember that Too Busy For Love thing? Well, as if a full year's schedule of Chico's Angels shows ain't enough to keep me away from dating, I went and done sumpthin' real stupid.
I threw together a couple of sketches and auditioned for BEST IN DRAG SHOW.
The audition seemed to go perty well, then I got the call telling that me I am in. I will be my character Reba Areba, gunning for the crown as Miss Texas.
WHAT HAVE I DONE??
I have just committed myself to designing and creating 4-5 outfits and coming up with an entertaining show; preparing 6 months for a 1 night only event. I hadn't even considered the hidden costs, the storage of costumes & props and transport of such things... The time working on the show, and promoting it while working full time and keeping up with Chico's Angels & Reba's schedules!
Am I crazy or sumpthin'?
How do I know how much time and work it is? Well, back, over 15 years ago, I helped my, then, roommate, Kris put his show together and played a Mexican snow cone salesman for him...
That's where I met Oscar/Kay Sedia, who was running as Miss Mexico, little did I know how much of a time suck knowing Oscar would be!
The next year I returned to help my roommate, who ran again as another character, which firmly planted me in Oscar's head...
..leading to my involvement in Chico's Angels (another reason I am single & too busy for love).
Since then, the show has evolved into BEST IN DRAG SHOW
in a huge, fancy, historic theatre in DTLA
with shirtless hunks in the lobby promoting contestants
And contestants donning fabulous colorful & creative costumes
And Kay Sedia & Dee W. Iye doing color commentary every year.
Now I've put myself in the position of ignoring hundreds of invites to paint mugs at Color Me Mine or see someone's friend's Improv group in Reseda, in order to put together costumes & a talent that matches these clever bits...
Why do it?It's a fund raiser for Aid For AIDS and Alliance For Housing and Healing.
Stuff for Reba to post on her Instagram account.
With celebrity judges, a slight chance I'd meet Daniel Craig.
Not having to go see someone's friend's Improv group in Reseda...
All good reasons, but mostly to have fun and put on a great show!
I'm not concerned with winning ( I say that, now...) I just want to stretch my creative muscles and be part of something big, charitable and entertaining!
So, while I'd love to see the SHUSH! movie with you, I can't! I'm too busy!
I have to prepare for this pageant!
...But first, I have to prepare two numbers for Reba Areba to sing in John Cantwell's Cinco De Mayo Show, My Connie De Mayo!
The shows are May 3 & 6 at the Cavern Club Celebrity Theatre at the Casita Del Campo
Get tickets HERE
I have so much to do! THIS IS WHY I AM SINGLE!!!
P.S. without revealing too much, I'm looking for a hunk with a big stick for my talent portion!
Like this Steve Siler guy, maybe?
Wednesday, April 4, 2018
We start our last week of Chico's Angels 2: Love Boat Chicas tonight and just don't have time for anything else! (Except work)
But, I did have time for a little interview as Frieda Laye! Catch this 20 minutes of unpure delight and find out what Frieda Laye would have to say about Jesse Tyler Furgeson, Vikki Carr, Daniel Craig and "Specialty Actors"HERE
Also, this hunky guy is in the show, too!
Get tix here
Sunday, April 1, 2018
Don't worry!! I crafted one for you!