Friday, January 27, 2017

This Is Why I Am Single - I'm Afraid of CATS and Catfish

So, I was scrolling up and down on the Facebooks, as I will, when I heard a little >ping<.  I had a friend request.  The guy was a cutie, and I didn't know him.  I generally don't accept friend requests from people I don't know (nowadays), but I'll make an exception if we have a lot of mutual friends or in this case, if they're really cute.  Immediately a saw a notice that I had been Poked.  It was this guy.  He's cute, so I poked back.  Then, he poked back. So, I poked back. Then, he poked back. So, I poked back. "Keep it up, Fella, I GOT ALL DAY!" Before I knew it, I had a message.  It was from the cutie I had friended not a few moments ago.  It was a very complimentary, right off the bat.  I was flattered and IMMEDIATELY SUSPICIOUS.  What kind of person just gives a compliment like that?  Great, I just accepted a friendship of someone who has targeted me as his (or her) next Catfish victim!  I mean, come on, I'm supposed to believe that some young guy, who basically looks like the guy pictured above, finds me attractive?  Not one to be of great judgment, I decided to play along and see where this went and how outrageous it would get.  To be sure, I didn't pour it on heavy, I just volleyed, in a very measured fashion.  It became very clear that this Catfisher wasn't going to play a slow game.  I took a day off to consider my strategy.   I SHAN'T BE PLAYED FOR A FOOL, DAN! IF THAT'S YOUR REAL NAME! (Not his real name).

"What if this is real?" That's a silly thought. Really?  This guy finds me attractive and would like to get together. NOT LIKELY!  I did my detectiving (What some others may call "stalking") and saw that his profile contained more than one photo of him and his Instagram was populated by more than one photo of him in different settings... He is cute... ...and I have had someone find me attractive before...  I decided to call his bluff!
 "You win.  Let's get together." I finally replied.  After some suspicious back & forth (I knew it...) we finally set a date and time. (Is that because we hit a stalemate if he didn't agree to meet?)  All day I was expecting the message that says, "Something suddenly came up." (Totally Marcia Brady voice)
And wouldn't you know it the last message I got from him was, word for word "found a space, I don't need a permit."  I KNEW IT!!  I WASN'T FOOLED FOR A SECOND!!  WHAT AN... oh wait.  He actually showed up?  DON'T GET TOO EXCITED.  When I open the door, he looks exactly like his pictures.  OMG! He looks exactly like his pictures!  I played it cool, like I always have gentleman suitors breaking down my door to court me. "Why, look, the last one left his spats by the door.  He must have over looked them for staring into my eyes so lovingly on his way out."  I think he bought it.

This Is Why I Am Single; I can't trust that someone I find very attractive finds thinks the same of me.  How many times has someone I'm totally gaga for given me the "green light" and I was too insecure to act on it?  How did I get it in my head that attractive guys are not into me?  The ultra-crazy thing is this guy seemingly came out of nowhere.  He was very direct without appearing pushy- I say I like that, but when it happens, I don't believe it.    Truthfully, when I get hits on the FU Cupid, it's usually from guys, though nice, I'm not attracted to or find shifty (like no profile pic).  It's rare that I get anything from a real hottie (if ever).  This threw me extra good because it didn't happen on any dating site.  Luckily, I trust my instincts, even if they did have to trick me into letting this happen.

He was quite personable, we had a very nice time and I hope to see him again.

No comments:

Post a Comment