Gay of A Certain Age - Where Goes the Neighborhood?

Whilst in Texas, last week, I ventured to the Alamo Drafthouse to catch the documentary, WON'T YOU BE MY NEIGHBOR?  It's about Fred Rogers.  You know, Mr. Rogers!

I loved it and I'm not ashamed to tell you that I teared up throughout the movie.  There was nothing particularly sad or tragic... maybe somethings from the outside world that made me angry, but there were a lot of warm tears.  After the movie, my friend, Ted, also had moist eyes and he asked, "Why did I tear up like that?"  I thought that same thing while I was getting misty in the theater, "Why am I crying?"  Then, it occurred to me that this man seemed to be the embodiment of kindness and he was so caring and gentle that when compared with all the ugliness and narcissism present and constantly on display in our world right now, any example of kindness and generosity is enough to make a person shed tears!

I used to watch the show as a kid and I was surprised how I didn't pick up that I was actually watching a minister actual minister in a way that didn't make me feel like I was in church or being talked down to.  Some of the social issues that he addressed, in his gentle way, appear to have gone directly inside my psyche, without my thinking, "OK, I was told that..."  His message of love and tolerance was delivered as a matter of course, not one that had to be separated and pointed out.  Then, there was that moment in the movie where someone describing him says, "He was a conservative Republican."  I specifically remember the split second that I went from being shocked, then thought,"How can that be?" and resolved, "Oh, yeah, this was decades ago."

With our political climate what it is today, I couldn't stop wondering 

WHEN DID "CONSERVATIVE REPUBLICAN CHRISTIAN" GO FROM THIS

TO THIS???

Talk about climate change! (Yes, literally, talk about climate change; it's real.)

I can't think of two more diametrically opposed figures to fall under the same heading.

It's sad.

That's why the tears.

As a Gay of A Certain Age, I've lived to see decades of progress, achieved by people who care about other people and the planet.  I've lived to see all that progress be chipped away and rolled back by greedy, horrible people.  I've lived long enough to appreciate the awful irony that I was taught what's right by the same asshole who's tearing it all apart: the Conservative Republican Christian.

This Is Why I Am Single - My Alleged Father Part 4

I'll tell you, Facebook must be one of the worst inventions to ever be inflicted on the human race.  One of the worst things about it is that once parents catch on to the thing, they wanna "friend" their children.  The children, of course, are mortified because this is the moment they have to either take the risk of offending their parents with a "No, thank you" or actually changing and living their life in a way that their parents would approve.  I fall somewhere in the middle of that.  When I got a request from my mother, whom I love very much, I flinched.  Then, I thought about my Facebook life; I try to be a good person, have a positive attitude and and only occasionally burst into fits of rage that result in a post.  Then, there's the whole gay aspect; not that I'm ashamed of being gay or living a "gay lifestyle" or having drag be a huge part of my actor life, it's those Gay friends who sometimes post naughty things on pages... But heck, I think my ma knows she's taking that risk. I happily hit "Accept" on that friend request.  Then on the other side, I got a request from my alleged father.  We don't communicate much, but I was game.  I popped on over to his page to see what I would be getting into.  I found that he likes to post A LOT!  Sometimes he posts in all caps and sometimes more that 10 things in an hour.  The stuff he posts is usually religious or very political.  I thought, "No, thanks!  I don't need to see that popping up on my news feed 10 times each hour!"  So, I let that request sit there, I didn't deny it, I just let it sit.  I figured that all my settings are set to "public" so anyone can see what I post, therefore he access to my stuff, and I have access to his without the formal "accept" that would put all that stuff on my news feed. It works!  ...And, to be honest, a little part of me got some satisfaction from withholding from him as "revenge" for his absence in the past.

A thing about the Facebook in the last year or so; our political climate has become so polarizing and, in my opinion, dangerous that with so many exaggerated  forces pulling people to either side, it's easy to fall prey to crap that re-enforces one's view and pass it on.  I get it.  Sometimes, it feels irresponsible to NOT post something political.  Personally, my anti-Cheetohead posts consist of his picture stamped "Not My President" and "Fake President" to clearly state my stance and all other stuff I post or re-post I take from reliable news sources or clearly opinion-based pieces.  (Unless it's something REALLY funny or clever... then I might give in to temptation)  Otherwise, my posts are the usual show notifications, puppies, Dunnys and shirtless hot mens.  I have family members who occasionally post something that is in direct opposition to my views, but I've never felt personally attacked.  That was until yesterday, when I saw this posted on my alleged father's wall...

Not only is the meme, itself, anti-gay, he took the time to add "it's unnatural and evil".
If you click on the pic, you can see at the bottom where I immediately commented, "Your faggot son is unnatural and evil..."   SERIOUSLY?  I don't think I've ever heard a parent refer to their own child as evil, but here it is, proudly posted on his wall for all to see.  After I commented, I blocked him and deleted the friend request.  I mean, really!   What really bugs the fuck out of me is that this man, who seemed to have no problem that I, as a preschooler, knew of his mistress, Minerva, and knew that she was his side cooze;  Who had no qualms introducing me, a grade-schooler, to his illegitimate daughter, Myra, whom he fathered while still married to my mother;  Who had no problem living with Minerva or moving to California while still married to my mother and leaving her to raise four of his who-knows-how-many of his children by herself;  Who seemed quite comfortable barging in and crashing with us in between his bouts of employment (proudly displaying his Benny and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Boot collection along the wall, but not putting in for groceries);  Who had no issues, paying the Church to annul his marriage to my mother so that he may marry another woman in the Church. (So am I a bastard in the eyes of the Church since my parent's marriage never existed?); Who ( I honestly don't know how he took that other wreck of a marraige) racked up a second divorce:  After all that; infidelity, children out of wedlock, and two divorces, he is going to preach about the sanctity of marriage AND tell me I'm evil and unnatural?  Fuck that!

You know, it took me a long time to sort all of that stuff out in my head and heart to not hate the man.  I worked hard to try to see things from his side and thought, "He's just a guy whose dreams were too big for his circumstances..."  People make mistakes...  I let it go.  Until now.

I may be playing up the drama, I am a thespian (also unnatural & evil), after all...
It's not such a bold move that I've made here.  If I had forgiven and forgotten all that, I also never felt like I needed his approval or attention, frankly.  I'm just saying, that if you request your son's friendship on the Facebook, you may not wanna call him Unnatural and Evil.

This Is Why I Am Single; My alleged Father believes that I should not have the right to be married.

This Is Why I Am Single - Presidential Cock Block

LAST WEEK, ON DIE ALONE WITH ME.COM

I'm still ecstatic that my last encounter was actually not a Catfish incident!

Also, because I enjoyed meeting him, I thought I would do away with the "The ball is in your court" game playing and send him a non-threatening emoji message to let him know I was thinking about him.  I accidentally sent a really stupid looking one because I inadvertently tapped, when I meant to scroll. It was this awfully drawn "cupid" belly down, drawring circles in the sand.  Anyway, slightly embarrassed by the aesthetically displeasing cartoon message I sent, I anxiously awaited his reply, (perhaps a rainbow unicorn with tiny hearts fir eyes).  I few moments later I got his reply which was a message saying that he went to Puerto Villarta with friends and now can not return for 90 days.  I was a bit confused.  Did I think he was Latino?  I dont know what I thought, because actually and apparently, race doesn't mean that much to me.  A hottie is a hottie, am I right, DABs?
Anyway, he's in the US with a green card, but that's not enough to get him back in.
I shot back, "What'll you do? Where will you stay? What about work? Rent? Seeing me again?" To which he simply replied, "Ask Trump".

GODDAMMIT!!! I've been dubious about That Man from the beginning and actually think we are on the road to Naziland USA, and have worried about my rights as a GLBTQIFFPPPLMSNBRYCF American... I've always suspected that he will destroy this country!   But I never thought he'd actually cock block me! Look Orange Headed Asshole, I have enough obstacles in my romantic life!! I certainly don't need to have the only (available) guy to show interest in me in over a year to be detained in Mexico because you want US citizens to fear & hate Muslims, or people from Countries where Muslin folk live!  I'm sure this is no picnic for my suitor or the others of THOUSANDS of people affected by this dick show! I'm fuhrerous!!

Bur seriously folks, while I am mildly inconvenienced by this horrible action there are people whose lives have been turned upside down over this.  That Man's actions during his first 10 days in office have been mostly disruptive and destructive, designed to cause confusion and doubt while he and his cronies destroy our political system.  I hope this works out for those who are the pawns in this latest move, but I suspect, we'll see the chessboard flipped over, with all of us pieces strewn about before this entire mess is over.

Gay of A Certain Age - Feel the Burn

The results of this election are so devastating to me and my friends in ways some people don't understand.  Sure, I 'm worried that this country elected a man with no experience in public office, with no real plans revealed, who is also a proud asshole.  I'm also worried about our economy, environment, foreign relations and my rights as a gay Latino, but we'll survive all that.  I'm not afraid of Donald Trump.  I'm afraid of his supporters.  Trump "played the game" well and won.  Using rhetoric and actual words from Adolf Hitler, he whipped voters up in a frothy tizzy and, despite displaying all time low behavior for any presidential nominee EVER, won.  Congratulations Mr. Trump.  Unfortunately for me and my kind, after the election is done, he's President and we're left with the fear, anger and hate he's stirred up.  If you're not concerned about this, you are a lucky individual because you have never had to worry about being beat up or murdered for being who you are, or even looking like you might be "other".  This win by Mr. Trump has emboldened those who revel in their hate and anger and look to oppress others.  These people who do harm with words like "Nigger", "Kike", "Faggot" or do their harm with fists, baseball bats or easily accessed automatic weapons.  Some do the same with their GOD.

I'm not crying because my favorite cheerleader didn't get to be class President, I'm upset that these people "know" they are in the majority and they aren't wrong to hurt us.  Hurt me.  Even though I live in one of the gayest cities in the world, I still can't walk down the street at night, alone, without worry that I'll be assaulted for being Gay.  Let's be clear, I'll never feel completely safe ANYWHERE, but if the election had gone the other way, I'd at least feel like I had someone on my side, discouraging hateful behavior and actions.  Now, with this group's candidate on top, it feels like the first day of open season on minorities.

I'm also not crying because a part of me feels like, as awful as this feels, maybe there is some spark in the debris.  I was pro Bernie Sanders early on.  I preferred him because of Hilary's ties to big money.  When Bernie's candidacy didn't pan out, I happily threw my support Hilary's way.  I never believed the smear campaign that started even before she & Bill left the White House and I figured, even if she's tied to big money, she's not threatening to take away my so recently earned rights.  She's not threatening to undo all of the progressive movement we've made in 8 years, despite Republican obstruction at the highest level.  That's not even taking into account her many years of experience.  Unless there was a Republican candidate who didn't echo the last 8 years of obstruction and not threatening my rights, she's my choice.  Then, Trump happened.  He came in like a drunk, rug wearing uncle at a wedding, who grabs the bride's pussy, gives the groom a wedgie, pisses on the dance floor and pukes on the wedding cake before writing "Just Marred" on the limo in shit with his fingers.  There's no one at that wedding who wasn't offended.  That wedding is our political system with the Democrat bride and Republican Groom (accompanied by his best man, Third Party Voter) and today all the guests are left eating puked-on cake while standing on the pissed-on dance floor.  ...And before he drove away in the stolen limo, he turned CARRIE red and set the place on fire with his breath.  A little bit of me feels like yelling, "Let the mother fucker burn!"  because maybe that's what we need.  Maybe we need the whole thing burned to the ground, and it will burn, so that amid the ashes and debris, a little spark will grow into a giant Phoenix of a political system, where the parties are truly concerned with the best for our country and are more united than divided.

Trump isn't really part of the republican party, and if Russians aren't pulling his strings, maybe he isn't tied to anyone, with no debts of gratitude to repay through legislation and relaxing of regulations.  What if he actually makes decisions based on what the people need and not what big money mandates.  What if he doesn't really intend on building that stupid wall or going after my rights.  The people who elected him can't really expect him to him to keep any of those promises he made, they knowingly elected a liar.  If he said all those things simply to get their votes, lying day to day on camera, with proof, not hiding the fact that he's a liar and they elect him anyway, what's to stop him from going against all of that and doing some good for our country?  Maybe he won't take us back to WWII Germany...

Maybe I'm just a naive optimist, or a lonely Gay who's in fear for his life clinging to any delusion. All I know for sure is, as a Gay of A Certain Age, this is the most anxious a Presidential election has made me, EVER.