Tuesday, December 20, 2016

F.U. Cupid - All About Him

When I visit this site, which is usually only when I get a message from someone or the Cupidbot sends me a notice that someone likes me, I try to do it with an open mind.  I know I can be very judgmental.  I kept that in mind when I was creating my profile.  Instead of saying what I didn't want, I put up things I wanted, then lay little tests that would let me know if a responder "got" me or not; like my posting of a Kids in the Hall monologue for "What I Often Think about".  Anyway, I really get bugged by some profiles that immediately put me on edge.  Like this one:
(Click the pic, read for yourself)

I look at the profile pic and think, "My, this is a handsome fellow.  I wouldn't mind sharing a malted with him at the local five and dime."  Then I'm immediately turned off by the following;

1:  WeHo/Chealsea, you are simply not my jam.
     WTF?  I'm already disqualified because of my address?
     Or is he one of those idiots that lumps everybody into one category because he finds the behavior        of some people from the same area distasteful?
     Yes, everybody in this 1.3 mile area acts exactly the same way and should automatically be
      dismissed.  Besides, Chelsea isn't even Chelsea anymore, what with 8th avenue 
      invaded by banks, nail salons and drugstores & G Lounge closing along with mostly all the
      others... This ass has the nerve to bundle me in with whatever stereotype he has in his douchey 
      mind without having even met me and that bugs me!

2: "Oh and girl, please put a shirt on unless you're at the beach.  My personal value does not 
       rely on my physical currency"
      Fortunately, you can not hear me screaming like a rhino that has stubbed his toe on an arrant
      coffee table in the savanna.  First of all, the use of "Oh and girl..." sounds a lot like 
      WeHo/Chelsea stereotype that is not his jam, so he suffers from self-hate. Got it.  Next, more
       judgement on the guys who work out and like to show off and, perhaps give the impression that
       their physical beauty is all they have to offer. Listen, I very much enjoy seeing hot shirtless
      mens flaunting their pectacular torsos and may even get down right giddy if I were to receive
      attention from one of them, but still, ultimately, I'd have to consider if they have intelligence
      and personality to go along with it.  I certainly wouldn't attempt to shame them in my dating
      profile.  Also, I caught the switch half way through that critical comment.  We start out talking 
       about "those" people, then suddenly we are talking about him. That statement should either
       read, "... please put a shirt on unless you're at the beach.  I hope your personal value does not
       rely on your physical currency" or  "...I'll  keep a shirt on unless I'm at the beach.  My personal
       value does not rely on my physical currency".  Either he's saying he does not care for the flaunty
       guys or that he is not a flaunty guy.  When you smash them together like that, you get more of
       the self hate.

3: "I excel at connecting with people..."
       Finally, I get a chuckle.  Seriously, he's going to start his profile by shutting down people in 
       back to back paragraphs and then say he excels at CONNECTING with people??   This is the 
       worst part;  I get the impression that he doesn't really know himself- at least not as much as he
       hates himself.

Despite immediate impressions, this post is not written to simply blast this guy, it's to say that I wish I could go on to a dating site and read a profile without feeling attacked.  It's hard enough to get the rejection after approaching someone, but to get rejected by simply reading their profile is just disturbing. I feel like I'm being pushed aside on my own screen!  Luckily, I've been watching CRIMINAL MINDS for over a decade, so I know and understand human behavior.  I can suss out, that the matter here is not with me, but with him.  It's all about him.

1 comment:

  1. There is a reason that I am not on any dating profiles or sex apps, because the trend these days seems to be talking about what we don't like rather than WHO we are (perhaps they are the same?). Don't be fooled by handsome faces--you can't spit without hitting one in this city. Kindness, respect, and compassion are those rare qualities that I look for, and I can usually spot them better in person than online. Want to know everything about a person? Have them drive you somewhere and see how they behave on the road. Better info than any curated profile.