Monday, January 11, 2016

This Is Why I Am Single - 'Member? Monday

This is when I went to Miami with a group of muh DABs!  'Member?  This was my first time in Miami and it was such a great time.  Here's the thing, I might have had an even better time, but I had something weighing on me... my weight.  I thought I was hideously fat.  When I found this picture while looking for another one, I was all, "What?? I thought I was fat?"  Crazy, right? ...'Cause I'm looking at that pic and thinking to myself, 'I'd do me.'  (I'm the one on the left).  Isn't it crazy how looking back at something with today's eyes can totally change an hard held opinion one had in the past?

This Is Why I Am Single; even though I have had the revelation that I wasn't as fat as I thought I was and shouldn't have let it encumber my enjoyment of Miami,  I can't look at myself now with tomorrow's eyes and convince myself that I'm not as fat as I think I am.  Yeah, this week my evil scale told me I'm the heaviest I've ever been.  Don't worry, I'm not suicidal, and I'm already heading back down to my almost acceptable/settling-for plateau weight, through a little dieting.  My weight does sometimes knock my self-esteem down, while sometimes, I don't let it get in the way, or very rarely, I might feel like it's the reason I'm sexy to someone.  I will say, that over the years, while I have not lost or even maintained that weight, I've done better at dealing with the way I let it affect me.  Obviously, I haven't gotten any better at feeling badly enough about it that I go to the gym... but, that's another "This Is Why I Am Single", ain't it?


  1. Do with your weight what you are comfortable with! I realize that guys will objectify our physicality, which is fine, but I refuse to be with someone for whom that is the primary draw. Because, we change, and the physical is important but just the icing. I have had people tell me not to trim my beard, and I just thank them and then do what I want. I can't be responsible for others' lack of curiosity or imagination!

    By the way, I would have done you back then too!

  2. I love this website. You're speaking truth to crazy! It's an inside job. Xoxo