Monday, June 1, 2015

This Is Why I Am Single - I SAID..!

I don't know why it is, but stuff comes out of my mouth at a very quick clip.
I'm not aware of it until I see a video of a performance or hear a
recording of me.  Then, I wonder why no body told me that I was being unintelligible!
This is why I am single; I think some of the guys I get flirty and clever with, have no idea how charming I am being because they can't understand anything coming out of my mouth.
They have no idea I'm coming on to them, or worse still, have no idea when I'm being straight forward with them and might have actually said, "Take me, I will be your slave."
I know thoughts race through my head at breakneck speeds, but my mouth has always been faster than my brain,  (That's another "This Is Why I am Single in itself).

Looking back, I feel so sorry for my mother who would always ask me, "what?" and I'd blow up at her with a frustrated "I SAID...!", as if it was her fault words were coming out of my mouth like lightning. ...As if she wasn't listening.  Honestly, it's hard for me to tell when I'm doing it, but I guess I have to assume I'm doing it all the time.  So whenever I'm waxing Noel Cowardesque, and the guy is giving a blank stare, I'll consciously slow down my speech.  If I still get the blank stare, I'll go to my default assumption that he just doesn't get me.
Actually, this realization has boosted my self esteem a little bit, because now I can look back at all that rejection and dismiss some if it as a lack of understanding my lightning fast speech on their part. Of course, in that case, I don't know how much I want to improve my elocution...  

1 comment:

  1. Huh? What did you say? I'm always telling you this!!! ALWAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And because I'm always telling you I can't understand you, I'm single too!!!